Friday, March 23, 2007

MAD About You (Some of the Usual Gang of Idiots): The Complete Second Season, Boxed-Disc Set

Bored in the U.S.A. (left): "Sylvester P. Smythe" is the janitor featured on every cover of Cracked Magazine.

He does pretty well for himself despite never being arrested on tax evasion, invading Norway on false pretenses, drunk driving with Tony LaRussa, winning an Emmy for his "naked news" or betting on baseball with Pete Rose!

Well, just when I question the "sports sanity" of the Cleveland Browns and their organization (that I rally around with reckless abandon), along comes the Houston Texans to claim the top spot of the "Too Stupid to Live" on the NFL food chain (Better luck next time, Oakland and Detroit!).

I don't know how they did it - or WHO they did - but how anyone can cash a paycheck in professional sports with the moves this team has made is beyond me.

Passing on Vince Young, Matt Leinart and Reggie Bush for - Mario Williams?

Trading top multiple draft picks for a backup quarterback - Matt Schaub? Are you kidding me? Is this a joke? The Houston Texans are making Matt Millen of the Detroit Lions look like the Albert Einstein of the gridiron and Al Davis is reminding me more and more of that guy in the wheelchair writing about "wormholes" and stuff (I can't remember his name, but when I see Stephen Hawking at lunch, I'll be sure to ask him).

Still, I have no qualms with the owner of the Cleveland Browns - simply because he spends the money necessary to win. However, watching the Browns under the woeful Romeo Crennel last season was about as painful to witness as being tied to a chair, with my eyelids taped open, and forced to watch NASCAR on a continuous loop (Although, now that I think about it, NASCAR is a continuous loop by nature).

The NFL Draft is about a month away - Let's hope the Cleveland Browns aren't too busy studying for their "ESPN Fantasy Baseball Drafts" and focus on their own team needs. Brady Quinn, Joe Thomas or Adrian Peterson are all within their grasp - don't fumble the ball on the goal line NOW.

Chris McVetta is a "janitor of journalism" who enjoys mopping up after sports teams in Cleveland with his sloppy prose and bucket of pop culture chum.


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