Friday, March 30, 2007

The Cleveland Browns listen to me like George Costanza's mother listens to the Chinese!

Getting my whines crossed: Trent Green (pictured, left) would look like a quarterbacking machine in an orange and brown uniform with 4,000+ yards a season and numerous Pro Bowls, wouldn't he?

Will wonders never cease? For months I have been BARKING about how the Cleveland Browns cannot possibly go into their 2007 season with Charlie Frye and Derek Anderson as their starting quarterback tandem - and expect to win many games.

Yes, the offensive line is a top priority, but signing free agent Eric Steinbach will help that greatly (and drafting another talented young lineman in the second or third round would help even more). Still, the Cleveland Browns need a new quarterback (in one form or another) to start next season.

Don't give me the usual "Tim Couch was a #1 bust behind an awful line, Jeff Garcia didn't fit into our system, Charlie Frye needs time to develop" rhetoric - which are all valid arguments if you like to live in the past like the cavemen from those tired GEICO commercials.

Tim Couch, yes, was busted up behind a bad line and Garcia is not going to flourish in Tampa Bay, either, because he's a product of a successful "system" - not a proven quarterback. And Charlie Frye has made too many "bad decisions" when the game is on the line in crucial times (Baltimore, for starters, anyone?).

Now, what should the Cleveland Browns aspire to be in the NFL - the Buffalo Bills? A good offensive line, yet no talent in the backfield - with the likes of J.P. Losman as your quarterback and a running back to-be-named later? As George Costanza would so aptly shrug: "It's the chicken and the egg."

So, what has my solution been for the past few months? Simple: Draft Brady Quinn (if available) with your #3 pick in the first round of the draft and trade for a veteran quarterback in the meantime (Trent Green) for a mid-round pick.

PHIL SAVAGE: "What-? He's not Chinese! (Pauses) Well, this changes EVERYTHING."

GEORGE COSTANZA: "What's the difference? He still gave you good advice! Who cares where it came from-?"

PHIL SAVAGE: "OH NO! I'm not taking advice from some blogger from Lake County!"

RANDY LERNER (Storms out of the room): "You want a divorce, Cleveland? I'LL GIVE YOU A DIVORCE!!!"

JERRY SEINFELD: "You know might want to consider changing the name of your blog."

And you can take that bit of wisdom - wrapped in a fortune cookie - to the bank! Or my name's not "Donna Chang" - and it's not.


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