Friday, December 23, 2005

Must Love Blogs

I was recently included in a "Carnival of Blogs" here in Cleveland, Ohio.

Thank you so much for including me in your event! It was truly an honor to be involved in this exciting new medium, which let me expose my writing (or, um, lack thereof) to a whole new audience.

Anyway, the Cleveland bloggers will be hosting this event again - which gives everyone interested a chance to read and view some amazing new voices - and, more importantly, talent.

You can check out this current crop of writers on the blogosphere at:

Brewed Fresh Daily

In other shameless news, the Cleveland Cavaliers won their 4th game in a row! The mainstream media here in Cleveland exclaimed a while back: "What's wrong with The Cavs?"

NOTHING at all from where this writer is sitting! We said so some time back, in fact! (Hmmm, maybe I need to crash LeBron James' 21st birthday bash, huh-?) They beat some damn good teams in the meantime - not to my surprise, however.

LeBron's da Bomb! Go CAVS!

Happy Holidays to all - and to all a good night!

A Blue Christmas

LUTZ, Fla. (AP) -- A medical examiner's preliminary report Friday confirmed that the 18-year-old son of Indianapolis Colts coach Tony Dungy, James Dungy, took his own life, although the cause of death will not be determined for four to six weeks.

This is just horrible... What a terrible tragedy. My heart goes out to the Dungy family on their loss.

It just goes to show you, that you never truly know what goes on behind closed doors, but this kid should have been on top of the world.

It makes you think of all the people out there in the world that are hurting and feel that they have no place to turn - and it makes you wish you could help them in any small way, shape, or form - before it ends like this.

At least it makes me feel this way... no matter who they are.

Monday, December 19, 2005

A 19 Crackhead News exclusive: Toucan Sam, The Bird Flu and YOU!

The id and I - Now with Dual Doppler Blimp Radar. "Because blimps explode. And when they do, you better be ready, dumbass!"

I have had about all I can take with these "holiday Christmas specials" on T.V. If I see one one more group of singing and dancing puppets, dressed in kaiser outfits, I'm going to scream. Yes, Condoleezza Rice, Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfield - this means YOU.

I'll leave the political bashing to Jon Stewart, however, because I don't want the Bush administration to start illegally spying on me (although - sigh - I'd probably appreciate "the company"). I don't want to "slip up" and go off on some rant about how I love Ben & Jerry's ice cream or something - especially Dave Matthews Band Magic Brownies ice cream - and then get lumped in with the rest of those "communist assholes." (Lick Global Warming!)

"We had to spy on Ben, Jerry and that odd McVetta fellow because we honestly believed they had a SECRET STASH of these Magic Brownies," I'm sure Condie Rice might calmly spin on "Meet The Press" next Sunday. "You know - because of Sept. 11th..."

The next thing you know, the U.S. Army is invading historic downtown Willoughby in search of (MBMD's) - Magic Brownies of Mass Destruction. I just don't need those kinds of headaches!

But that's neither here nor there. Hey, it's the holidays here on the North Coast - and that means only one thing: Pray to your favorite holiday deity (or Scientologist) to bring you some kick-ass gifts this holiday season! My "Secret Santa" struck early this year - trying to snap me out of my cold-weather funk - by delivering my gift to my doorstep a week before Christmas...

A DVD collection of "Harvey Birdman: Attorney-at-Law" from "Adult Swim" on the Cartoon Network. Just in time for the cold and bird flu season!!! (Hey, what did you think I was going to get: the very best of "Masterpiece Theater"?)

Ah, my Secret Santa - she knows me so well (poor girl). At least I didn't get another one of those Beers of the World gift sets like the one I always get from my boss at work. Oh, sure, I like beer ...obviously (I mean, I'm Irish ...I'm a writer YOU do the math!) but how much beer from obscure countries can one man drink... (That was a rhetorical question, folks!).

Harvey Birdman is kind of "the Kathy Griffin of The Hanna-Barbera world." A D-List character who sarcastically defends other A-List inhabits of his carefully-drawn universe from heinous crimes (they, um, almost always commit):
  • Boo Boo Berry as "The UnaBooBoo Bomber."
  • Shaggy and Scooby-Doo getting busted for "possession."
  • Apache Chief filing a lawsuit against a coffee chain after spilling hot java on his apache crotch and getting "erectile disfuntion" as a result.
  • Dr. Benton Quest and his "life partner" Race Bannon fight over custody of their kids, Jonny and Hadji.

See what I mean-? Good stuff! Practicing law was never this much fun...

And, until new episodes of "My Name is Earl" and "Scrubs" are back on the air, I need something to hold me at bay. Something to maintain my last shreds of sanity during all the hectic holiday travelling out on the major roadways and interstates in this godforsaken weather - Man does not live by Blog alone, folks!

Because, I swear, if get one more freaking gift card from "Old Navy" this Christmas, it's not going to be pretty. I mean, how many retro-bowling shirts and cargo pants can one man own-??? (That's another rhetorical, folks...)

But 13 episodes of "Harvey Birdman: Attorney-at-Law" on DVD should keep "the Kong in me" appeased - at least for a little while anyway...

Other than that, here's wishing you a happy holiday - and a MERRY CHRISTMAS, as well - you bunch of pagans!!! (And please bring our troops home safely in 2006).

The id and I supports Peace on Earth through Pop Culture. Chris McVetta's wardrobe courtesy of "Dawson's Creek."

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

LeBron's da Bomb: Or How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love The CAVS!

The id and I - Welcome to The Bermuda Triangle of journalism!

The Cleveland Cavaliers, those swashbuckling hoop-slicers in shorts, are back at it again for the 2005-06 NBA season and there is a new sign hanging up down at the arena: "Under new management."

Majority owner Dan Gilbert has breathed new life into "The Q" (along with his partner, Usher, who, as a Cavs' fan, makes you feel like a latch-key kid without his notable presence there). Danny Ferry, who once raised fans' ire, and probably inspired the comic book guy from "The Simpsons" to quip "Worst trade EVER!" is back in business as the new "golden boy" General Manager. Rounding out our corporate cast of rogue round-ballers is Mike Brown, large and in-charge, as the new head coach snatched from the talented coaching gene pool of The San Antonio Spurs and Indiana Pacers.

Oh, and let's not forget a little someone named LeBron James, either!

This being "Browns' Town" - it's easy to sometimes forget The Cavaliers in the Cleveland sports trifecta shuffle (especially early in the NBA season). But don't let Seasonal Affective Disorder make you SAD, football fans - the last thing you need to do is go hang yourself out back in the toolshed! There will be plenty of time for THAT if and when LeBron James skips town for the bright lights of New York or L.A.

Is LeBron James the next Michael Jordan...? Dude, he's better! Much, much better. I've seen both b-boys play in their prime, and Michael Jordan was never this good at an early age. It took years for "His Greatness" to become, well, great. LeBron is doing it here - now - at the tender age of twenty.

He's faster than a speeding RTA bus through one of downtown Cleveland's stupid camera stoplights! He's more powerful than Big Dawg's appetite! He's able to leap abandoned downtown office buildings in a single bound! And "The Spy Club" is apparently his Fortress of Solitude...

But, LeBron, unlike the island on "Lost" - is not an island unto himself. And even Superman needs help from The Justice League once in a while. LeBron James needs help to win a championship, folks. Just like Jordan needed Pippen and company to win all those titles in Chicago, so will LeBron. That's why Dan Gilbert and Danny Ferry went out and spent some big bucks on free agents like Larry Hughes, Donyell Marshall and Damon Jones. To bring a championship to "The House of Usher" - and, hopefully, keep LeBron in town for the far, far future.

With big man on campus, Zydrunas Ilgauskas, under the net every night (hopefully), these new additions need to add defense, rebounding and outside shooting to LeBron's already larger-than-life game. "Z" may not get the respect at "The Q" from media outsiders and some fans, but he's still one of the better centers playing in the league right now. The rest of the alphabet people include (D)rew Gooden, (E)ric Snow, (S)asha Pavlovic and Anderson "Wild Thing" (V)arejao - not a bad lineup on any given night, when all are healthy, and all things being equal.

Maybe I don't know "metrosexual muppets" from mascots, but Moondog has got to be a serious upgrade from Whammer. The name "Whammer" itself sounds like a nickname for some curious kid "experimenting with himself" during those awkward teenage years - but as a mascot for The Cavs? Not so much.

And let's not forget our jedi-in-training, Luke Jackson, shall we. Sure, a lot of fans have been beating down on the "Oregon prodigy" - but I like this kid's potential (even if he is from Bigfoot country). Luke's coming off major back surgery - and re-entering his rookie year, this year. Give him a chance and I think he will surprise some people as he continues to get healthy and learn the game on the pro level (If not, then Donald Trump can fire me for extreme incompetence on the next edition of "The Apprentice: Sports Journalism," I guess!).

Other than that, grab your bobbleheads and your favorite Cavalier girl (um, not necessarily in that order), and enjoy the show known only as YOUR Cleveland Cavaliers. All for one. One for all.

Chris McVetta is a contributing writer for North Coast Voice Magazine in Ohio. What he "contributes" is anybody's guess! But, regardless, he likes to write about The Cleveland Browns, Indians and CAVS ...even if his pop culture prose belongs on a placemat at Beef Corral.